It’s no good. I can’t help myself as I’m still smiling as I type. Just a couple of hours ago, I was giggling like a school girl as I had the pleasure of following an ice cream van being driven with rarely-seen verve and gusto.
The ice cream van in question was a tiny Suzuki Carry. With an exceptional overall vehicle height in excess of 8 feet (2.4m), but with the Suzuki’s narrow track and skinny tyres retained, watching this enthusiastically-driven ice cream van tackling corners and roundabouts at some speed (and occasionally on just two wheels!) was truly hilarious, cheering-up what otherwise would have been a dull and forgettable journey.
For me seeing an unlikely machine being driven in an uncharacteristically lively manner with great skill is always a pleasure. For some years, I regularly used to meet a well-driven Volvo 240 estate en route on my long and dreary daily commute, with this ungainly road-barge frequently disgracing drivers in superior cars with far better handling and pace. A Goodwood colleague in his old and battered second-generation Nissan Micra, which he drove like a WRC rally car at all times, was a constant source of pleasure too, as long as you weren’t sitting in the passenger seat!
Years of owning and driving plenty of small-capacity, under-powered cars – such as my 28 bhp Citroen Mehari and 32bhp Honda Z 600 Coupe – have taught me the art of anticipation and the importance of reading the road ahead. This principle to read the road far ahead equally applies to driving any vehicle, even in my 6.6-Litre V8 Bristol 411 with its huge dollops of torque and thrust.
Even today, in my regular long commute from the Chiltern Hills down to the Goodwood office at the Motor Circuit, I often come across much more powerful and capable cars than my eager but under-powered Fiat Panda 100hp that should trounce my little hot-hatch, yet amble along at a frustratingly leisurely pace.
Two cars in particular spring to mind that I often get stuck behind heading down to Goodwood, to the point that I now dread seeing them appearing up ahead of me in the distance on the road.
The first of these is a metallic pale-blue BMW M3 coupe, a performance machine that could easily eat my Fiat’s shorts, yet it is driven by someone either nervous of its performance potential or just simply a lousy driver. Try and overtake, and the M3’s owner will accelerate, making it a challenge to pass in anything less powerful, such as my Panda, yet she will slow down to a virtual crawl at the slightest hint of a bend. The second offender drives a white Porsche 911, with poor road sense, sporadic braking and a general fear of fellow road users it seems.
These cars are simply wasted on their owners. Their drivers would progress from A-to-B just as quickly and far more frugally in a cheap and cheerful Dacia or Kia, yet mysteriously they have chosen to buy powerful, expensive and very capable high-performance machines instead, just to become mobile obstacles.
Give me an experienced, safe and decent driver in any vehicle, any day, over an inadequate motorist in a powerful performance machine that many drivers would make great sacrifices to own. To the skilful ice cream man at the wheel of that tiny Suzuki, I salute you. To the M3 and 911 drivers I often get stuck behind though, kindly consider your fellow road users and do us all a favour; start working from home!
axon's anorak
Fiat
Panda
BMW
M4
Porsche
911
Suzuki
Carry